Food for thought.When my mom was cleaning out her house over 23 years ago to sell it, I wasn't very sympathetic over her attachments to things. I would go over on weekends to help her and we would go through things, things for a yard sale, things to donate, things to throw away. I would usually get upset over how long it was taking her to decide. For instance, we were going through kitchen cabinets and she spent 20 minutes looking at an iron kettle with a lid. Finally I said, I knew this under the age of 60, when my Mother died and we had to clean out the house and move my Dad. A clean out service came for what nobody wanted. When they started smashing glass ware and dishes in trash bins... I lost it. I rescued the Christmas Ceramics she painted. I see that do many times. Things that older people cherished are nothing but trash to their kids. I feel very fortunate that my kids are very sentimental about things that are 2 or 3 generations old. I said something about cleaning out closets and getting rid of some things. They all said “don’t get rid of anything”! I’m 82 so guess they’ll have the pleasure of going thru stuff. I have taken pictures and indicated who gets what. I have things that belonged to great grandparents snd the kids want those things. I feel blessed that they appreciate their heritage.
Thanks, Steve Gonzales, for reposting - and for creating the original project!
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Photos from The Village of Tanglewood's post
Wish I had known you were there! I would have come to see you. Would love to have you come to Touchmark in Helena,Montana.
SHOWTIME! Kicking off this week's ***15!*** shows with Conroe friends!
Well done. Who ran out of gas first, the dance4 or you? 🤠😜 You still got it Jim! I loved this! Just wanted that guy to invite one of those other folks to join him! Wow, Jim! You are a wonder! Love this. Great job Jim
“Mom, at this rate it is going to take us another 2 years.”
She told me that her mother used to make meals in that kettle and leave them at doorsteps of neighbors during the depression, mom would deliver them, and then they would reappear back to her with an apron, or a wood carving, something in return for the meal. I realized that everything that my mom was going through was really a reliving of her life.
If you are reading this and are under the age of 60, you wont get it. You haven't lived long enough. Most of you have not had to move your parents into a nursing home, or emptied their home. You haven't lived long enough to realize that the hours you spend picking out the right cabinets, or the perfect tile will not be what matters in the later years. It will be the handmade toothbrush holder, or a picture that you got on vacation.
So, if your parents are downsizing, and moving to smaller places, or selling a home, give your mom and even your dad a break. Those things that you don't understand why they can’t just pitch, and why you think you know what needs to be tossed or saved, give them a little time to make their decisions. They are saying goodbye to their past, and realizing that they are getting ready for their end of life, while you are beginning your life.
As I have been going through things, its amazing just how hard it is to get rid of objects. But, life goes on, and you realize they are just things, but sometimes things comfort us. So give your parents or grandmparents a break. Listen to their stories, because in 40 years, when you are going through those boxes and the memories come back, it will be hard to get rid of those plastic champagne flutes that you and your late husband used at a New Years party 40 years ago. You will think nothing of the tile or the light fixtures that were so important then.
As happy as they are for you, and as much as they love you, you just don't have a clue until it happens to you and then you will remember how you rushed them, and it will make you sad, especially if they are already gone and you cant say I’m sorry, I didn’t get it.
~ Original Post Melissa Vaughan
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